The summer holidays are finally here.

And before thoughts turn completely to holidays, BBQs, gardening, catching up on sleep, or just staring into space for a bit…

I wonder if it’s worth a short reflection on parents.

Not just the difficult conversations.

The patterns.

The tone.

The relationship between home and school.

Because if you think back over the last year, there were probably moments where parent relationships felt:
supportive,
encouraging,
and genuinely collaborative.

And there were probably moments that felt:
draining,
emotionally charged,
or like they took far more time and energy than they should have.

That’s understandable.

Parents are under pressure too.

And today’s parents are different.

They’re more likely to question.
More likely to escalate.
More likely to send long, AI generated, emails late at night.
More likely to expect immediate responses and personalised solutions.

And when schools are already stretched, that can feel relentless.

But even more so – when you and your team are so committed to your children, it can hurt when someone thinks you’re not doing the best for their child.

Something I’ve noticed from working with schools over many years:

The first two weeks of September shape far more of the parent culture than we realise.

Because September teaches people how your school works.

What gets a response.
What gets escalated.
What gets tolerated.
What boundaries exist.
What partnership looks like.

Not through a policy.

Through lived experience.

And you might think it’s too late for those who have been in your schools for years, but it’s not, a reset can work.

So here’s something simple you can do before September.

Get the lay of the land.

List ‘those’ parents.

Then do a quick analysis and look for patterns:

• What are the common issues?
• When did things start to become difficult?
• What tends to trigger escalation?
• Are the same staff repeatedly involved?
• Has anything improved the relationship?
• Has anything accidentally made things worse?
• Are expectations unclear anywhere?
• What boundaries became difficult to hold consistently?

And perhaps most importantly:

What is this really telling us?

Often, analysis gives us clarity on a small change that could have a huge impact.

Let me know what you find.

The goal isn’t blame.

It’s clarity.

Because clarity helps you decide what needs tightening, reinforcing or resetting in September.

You can now ask:

1. What needs to feel different this year?
2. What kind of parent culture do we want to build?
3. And what do we want to reinforce — or stop reinforcing — next year?

Because September doesn’t just start a school year.

It sets a culture.

Here’s to a restful summer, and a calmer year ahead,

Sonia ❤️